Be Quick to Compliment and Slow to Criticise. And You’ll Be Much Happier...
The world is full of noise, opinions, and constant judgment.
So it’s easy to fall into the trap of criticism. Of others, of ourselves, of the way things are.
But what if we flipped that instinct on its head?
What if, instead of being quick to judge, we were quick to praise?
What if we made it a habit to highlight the good before pointing out the flaws?
This small shift in mindset can have a profound effect.
Not just on the people around us, but on our sense of happiness and peace of mind.
The Power of a Compliment
A sincere compliment is a gift.
It’s a spark of kindness that can light up someone’s entire day.
It doesn’t have to be grand or poetic.
Simple words like "well done" and "thank you" can carry enormous emotional weight.
Compliments affirm the positive.
They show that we notice goodness, effort, and beauty in others.
When you look for reasons to compliment rather than criticise, you train your mind to focus on the good.
You begin to see more good.
It’s a form of gratitude, and leads to greater happiness.
The Trap of Constant Criticism
Criticism, especially when it’s quick or careless, can damage relationships.
Even lower self-esteem, and create a negative atmosphere.
When we lead with criticism, people often become defensive or shut down.
And when we criticize ourselves too much, we chip away at our own confidence.
That’s not to say criticism doesn’t have a place.
Sometimes feedback is necessary for growth.
But it’s most effective when it’s thoughtful, kind, and constructive.
Not automatic or harsh. Think of it as seasoning, not the main dish.
The Science Behind It
Positive social interactions activate reward centres in the brain.
Both the giver and the receiver feel better.
Negativity or criticism can increase stress, anxiety, and even feelings of loneliness.
Being kind and affirming is good for your brain. It’s good for your heart. It’s good for your soul.
How to Make the Shift
Here are a few simple ways to practice this principle in daily life:
Pause before you speak. If your first instinct is to point out a flaw or mistake, take a moment. Is it necessary? Is it kind? Could it be said more gently?
Make it a habit to praise. Each day, try to give at least one genuine compliment to a friend, a stranger, even yourself.
Balance your feedback. If you must give criticism, sandwich it between encouragement. Lead with the positive, offer the needed correction, and end with support.
Celebrate effort, not just results. Not every compliment has to be about success. Praise people for trying, for caring, for showing up.
A Happier You — and a Better World
Being quick to compliment and slow to criticise isn’t just about good manners.
It’s a mindset that shifts your focus from what’s wrong to what’s right.
It makes you more patient, more gracious, and more joyful.
It builds better relationships. It lifts others up. And it creates a ripple effect of positivity.
And the best part? The more kindness you give, the more you receive.
Not always from others, but from life itself.
So today, choose to look for the good. Say the kind word. Hold back the harsh one.
You’ll experience how much lighter the world feels, and how much happier you become.
With very best wishes,
Chris Wilkinson.
I'm simply a Messenger of Hope for patriotic South Africans who want Positive Change..
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